Comparison and Mom Guilt
“Don’t compare yourself with others. Just look at our own work to see if you have done anything to be proud of. You must each accept the responsibilities that are yours.” Galatians 6:4-5 ERV
My sister, Jessica, recently invited me to join in a book discussion group study she is co-leading, via Zoom, on “The Grace Giving Leader” by Jan Greenwood. I was hesitant not because I didn’t want to, but that I wouldn’t be able to truly commit the time needed to do it well. I kept feeling prompted to just do it. We are now 4 weeks in and I am so thankful I jumped in. It’s a great opportunity to study God’s word and an eye opening, truth-speaking book with these women.
“Comparison will hurt you, delay your dreams, reduce your effectiveness, and steal your joy. It puts your attention on the wrong things and strives to convince you that you are not okay or not enough. It says, “Try harder. Do more.” It implies that what you do is more important than who you are.” (The Grace Giving Leader, by Jan Greenwood pg 46)
Comparison is a tough one for me, I find myself doing it way more then I care to admit. And it does steal SO MUCH of my Joy when I allow it to creep in. The Truth bomb in the paragraph above rings so true to my heart.
This week we are on chapter 3 in the book and it shares a journey from a Mom, Kristin Lemus, that I relate to so much! I have read and listened to it multiple times. Yes, I have been listening to the audible version as well as reading the book to soak up as much as possible during this busy season of Motherhood.
“Tired. Weary. Overwhelmed. Most days these words hung over me as a mom. Guilt over what I had not gotten done and shame about what I thought I should be doing were constant Companions. At my wit’s end one night I asked God why I was such a bad mom without really expecting an answer. As soon as I said it though I heard God say:
“Who calls you a bad mom? I call you a good mom. When I created everything, including a woman’s capacity to be a mom, I stood back and called it good. If you will begin to believe Me and confess this as truth, you will become it.”(The Grace Giving Leader, by Jan Greenwood pg 71 &72)
… “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or dismayed. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9 ……”
I have been moved in my heart this week that this isn’t just something I needed to hear, but that another Mom, who like me, struggles with comparison, guilt and feeling like a bad Mom, needs to hear it too. Soak up the truth of God that you are a good Mom! And then dear one, pass it on!